login is acting weird...

I recently got hosted by a friend of mine and we've been trying to get my login to work for three days now! She copied and pasted the username, password, and address directly from her program, and she said she had gotten it to work on hers. I pasted it into mine so no mistakes were made, and it was waiting for the login sequence to start but that timed out, I let it continue trying and finally it kept saying over and over (no matter how many times I exited/disconnected) "No connection could be made because the target machine actively refused it" It won't even let me into the SmartFTP link as anonymous under favourites, so I know something's up... 8O What should I do? :?

Thanks, and sorry for the bother

~~*Tigeress*~~